How the world must laugh as England’s politicians are having another sex scandal. So there is this specimen Chris Rennard who must surely be wearing a Michelin body suit designed by a special effects genius who should be up for and Oscar ( the effects person I mean) ,allegedly feeling up two party workers on sofa. I mean give us a break, is this man out of a freak show or what? Or was it some sort of sick honey trap? And to cap it all apparently this Chris bloke likes to go about in bare feet which leads me to assume that he has a health issue with them, a form of athletes foot no doubt contracted from the exertions encountered lumbering after voluptuous parliamentary wannabes don’t go there girls it will end in tears. It’s terribly demeaning of Nick Clegg to have allowed this insult to femininity to go unchallenged. Are all these people in Westminster selected for their lack of sexual attractiveness?
I am back to my suggestion that we start electing gorgeous clever transsexual people for Parliament, this would have two advantages, firstly it would overcome the appalling resistance to women in Westminster, since they would not tolerate the patronizing attitude to women in Parliament, and certainly would not demean themselves by sitting on a sofa with a fat blob with smelly bare feet. Secondly it would add some tone to the place, and at least if there was a sex scandal it would be nice to look at. Coming “hot foot” after the other “Chris Gate” I am beginning to wonder if they have all lost the plot, like Hilary Mantel whose horrible onslaught on the blameless Duchess of Cambridge has brought her such notoriety that her book sales have doubled. Are we a country which has begun to worship fat ugly people with bad teeth who talk in Mickey Mouse voices?
We had a lot of people to dinner this week and I cooked for two days , it was well worth the effort and they would all have looked great on the front pages of a sex scandal . The food was a great success although the Sainted One remarked that the fish mousse was rather lacking in flavour. I guess the subtlety of it escaped him. Yesterday I had a small operation on my hand for a thing called Dubitrons it is hereditary. I meet a lot of very clever people who also have this, and am told we are all descended form the Vikings , I always knew there was some explanation for my incredible genius, I mentioned this to the Sainted One today and he gave me a funny look ( looks do not come cheap round here) and said that Margaret Thatcher also had it….. see what I mean.