Early Ranchers And The New Matriarch also More Lost Socks.

Really important people should not have to concern themselves with the continuing saga of lost socks. As you will see from the recently posted photo some very nice looking people gathered here at the weekend to remember three brothers who went to Texas in 1840 and bred an incredible horse. It was the Quarter horse and many thousands of these beautiful creatures were shipped to the British Army in South Africa for use in another pointless war. Their fate is of course a subject which is deeply distressing , but as one is often told must be considered in the context of the time. Even so these men loved their horses and a representation of their descendants assembled in London this weekend. Moi has been officially appointed the Matriarch of this great Texas family as my wonderful cousin Edie was called to heaven. The Anson brothers, who founded this interesting dynasty were the younger sons of thirteen children produced by the Earl of Lichfield and his enthusiastic wife. They must have been a tough crowd and well tended by a hundred staff at Shugborough the family home. And would never have had to look for a lost sock.

I must not let my newly awarded grandeur go to my head and think I have moved out of the mysterious world of wandering socks. The population of lonely socks is still growing in my house and sometimes gets very emotional . The situation escalated at the weekend as I was preparing the large dinner for all these adorable people helped by the Polish Angel Joanna. There were of course offers of help, but these had a mysterious way of becoming a quick snack followed by rest. So you can imagine I was on the hunt for my support socks …….Two of these were eventually located on Monday in someone’s dirty laundry basket, but it was a reunion laced with anguish because they were odd. There is a mismatched pair at large somewhere. Perhaps in another household of lonely socks who knows? The two survivors are making the best of it, but their usefulness as is mine is not what it was, you see only men live here lovingly waited upon by the Matriarch. ……… I am going away soon?????


Dangling Modifiers, and other Bits that Go Unoticed.

So last weekend the Sainted One had obviously taken a vow of silence again. Our house is on the seafront and the promenading public has a clear view of goings on inside. Once I threw a chair across the room, fifteen years ago actually . This drew a more than usually admiring audience. Well last weekend I got rather fed up with the feeling that I was an anonymous food dispenser, so I invited the S O to come to the catering centre and choose his lunch. I decided to do this topless, I offered him the full menu strategically held up for modesty’s sake, starting with two pork pies, he selected one without remark, so I tried two large tomatoes, again no comment , not a flicker I tell you, then I offered two hard boiled eggs. He chose them both. A Large crowd gathered on the sea wall, so at least I had my moment of fame. Enquires revealed beyond doubt that the state of undress had not been noticed by the S O.

This set me in mind of “ dangling modifiers”. I am told by editors that the latter are the scourge of modern manuscripts submitted by illiterate writers, of whom I am one. You see I really love split infinitives and I don’t really rate semi colons. I am definitely guilty of dangling modifiers. I once wrote a piece for The Sunday Telegraph of eight hundred words with no commas. It was one of my best and drew a large fan club. So with all things you can never be sure of what will turn people on.