I have given birth a few times, finishing a book is quite similar in a way, but then comes the withdrawal. I wallowed in this over Easter, alone in my house for the first time in twenty two years. The mornings were the best bit the glorious wakening . My first word were “ Hello Wall” my two dogs who look at me adoringly and from the wall came no answer Mollie and Beatrice, smiled as they do. I thought about nothing much and a lot about the characters in “Summers Grace” based on the family left behind as George Anson set off to capture the biggest prize in naval history. They of course were there as real as ever, and now comes the exciting bit where words become pages enfolded in a jacket over which I have no control and already I have to reconnect before these people are supplanted by others already waiting in the wings.
Easter is a time of regeneration and time to reflect on the events of the darkness hours of the winter not illuminated by the quality of leadership we expect. I do hope none of the women in the Osborne or Cameron families have not been forced to give up the so described luxury of tampons, for the revoltingness of sanitary towels. How are these people come up with such things? I bet there has been a lot of horrific “Hate Male”, brown paper bags bags left in the loos at my school were horror which scarred me for life. I think the Mrs Osbornes and Cameron should have shown support by publically supporting the plan if they cannot keep their men in order. A luxury indeed someone should have emptied a sack of blood soiled rags on the chancellors desk, the only option for women in the “Period” I have recounted. Its back to the dark ages ladies if these men have their way .I asked the sainted One if he had an opinion on the matter he said he knew nothing about it but he was glad the Europe had done the right thing !!!!!?????? , he has lead a very sheltered life you see, as have the majority of the Tory Cabinet. This is just the tip of the iceberg you wait and see people there is worse to come.
Yes the Ritz is the first choice. My life is a challenge and waking to the low sound of moaning, from different areas in the residence is hard, bright smiles fall on deaf ears. Having completed my seventh novel which features the ghastly hardships suffered by sailors in the eighteenth century I occasionally think I am actually living the bad dream. But then there are the good things like a wonderful birthday party planned with love and all the rest and a truly marvellous celebration in my house for Joyce D’ Silva’s thirty years in Compassion In World Farming, she is an astonishing woman and has changed the map for awareness of the suffering that animals have suffered in the name of factory farming. These are rare moments which must be sent from somewhere. But an all-time low today and dark thoughts about ……???? Were lifted by Harvey the hairdresser who did my hair and restored my life for all most nothing because he is one of those earthly angels. He knows I am on the edge in every way but again catastrophe is avoided then there is Albert who must remain anonymous but he is storing up untold riches somewhere, Albert gets it, he sees behind the façade. Don’t get me started on the “nipote” who lives here he is wise beyond this place and time.
That’s the thing about being a writer, you have to see what lies behind. I am reading my manuscript straight through for the first time and I see patterns drawn from my own life, the sense of loss which pervades all lives, that or the fear of it and the dysfunction of all families when things do not go as they think they should. Someone must be blamed, it is not just an act of God or a voice from the past coming through in the DNA we would not choose. As I get older the shoulders are narrowing and so are the choices, but writing is what saves you, it is a rare privilege it opens a wondrous world where people emerge and dance on the page, they think and you listen carefully and you learn.
So Donald Trump’s hair has been Hilary Clinton’s greatest asset she is now set to be the first woman president of America. How can anyone seriously consider a man who has spent more airtime talking about his hair do than anyone in the history of mankind? Clinton is a serious clever woman and keep praying that we will be saved from a blabbering hair piece .
Whoever started the hype about black actors not getting Oscars has done a great disservice to all black actors, the suggestion that there should be an obligatory quota of black actors receiving one is seriously insulting to the fabulous black talent both present and future. Just imagine the next black actor who gets and Oscar thinking he or she only got it to fill the quota it is both racist and patronizing, but the whole affair has cast a shadow which will not easily be removed. Chris Rock sang the song alright but it was a great pity he did not ignore this shameful wrong footing, which has diminished the integrity of the men and women who would have thrilled us just as the election of Obama did, one of the most joyous celebrations I can ever remember. This is Political Correctness shooting itself in the foot.
Everything in this house is beginning to collapse, it is known as the twenty year cycle. This house was all fixed when we bought it , everything new, and now it all needs replacing. People come with long faces and supply huge estimates which are from another planet, “parts are not available anymore” they are of another age before these fresh faced youths were born. This does not yet apply to the occupants but I can see it coming . With that in mind I get a lot of helpful advice at the moment the most infuriating of which is “do get some rest,” and then of course “do get some peace” . Come on people rest and peace are what words that appear on grave stones I don’t want either, I want to drink cocktails in the south of France and find the energy to take up salsa dancing. And how can you rest when the underpants are piling up on the laundry floor. Of course the most ghastly phrase of all is to “ reach out” and “share”. People who “reach out” are phonies who don’t give a damn. The duty of care does not need to reach out, people know it is there it is a kind of courage which has no witness and no fanfare or round of applause. I know a lot of those, angels who come and go like the one who found my car keys the other day. The secret of happiness is to be very selective.