The Cojoined Twin, The Doolaly Lama, and The Big Freeze.

I have been silent on my laptop for many weeks owning to my attachment to my conjoined twin a Pico Pump which has been miraculously curing my suppurating elbow, the history of which is too odd to elucidate save to say it was the result of a “big bang”. Anyway I have been separated for two days now and able to use my right arm. I have learned a lot from the experience , for example the bravery of handicapped people, kindness beyond calculation from all sorts of people where you least expect it and really peculiar weirdness from some others. BUT mostly the fabulous gratitude to the NHS. I have been treated at the Chelsea and Westminster Hospital which is a centre of excellence. I have also come to see that Consultants are like the conductors of large Orchestras, they need to be rather charismatic to assemble a trustworthy team and as they were cutting and stitching I heard the banter and comradery sometimes behind a screen. It reminded me of the musical fraternity which occupied a lot of time in my early years. This hospital has and is treating some of the victims from the Tower Fire, I travelled in the lift with two of them the day after, it was a salutary experience. And then a young woman who was terribly burned from a chip fire, these people will have scars for the rest of their lives, I think of this often, but I am sure we were all given the same treatment. Mine is not over until the Fat lady Sings. The fat bit won’t be me as I intend to get thinner now I am mobile and not sounding like a continuous windbag. One of those in the house is more than enough.

One of my younger descendants spoke about the “Doolaly Lama” last week, of course I was no surprised, they also voted for Jeremy Corbyn that did not surprise me either , I understand he has a sobriquet of Vagina Corbyn amongst the youth because he bangs on about women all the time. All good malapropisms, so I am just going to disintegrate into the next room , but not before I have told you about the latest euphemism about being permanently pissed, its “ having a relationship with alcohol,” OK yah, got news for you I have a great relationship with my” bread bin “ . Oh yes and then there is the giant fridge freezer I have just acquired, someone here replugged it onto a lighting circuit in order to “save power” it blew everything up …….. I suppose I was not nice about this. It cost me a lot of money did that, plus it is a status symbol people have already been to see it . There is a lot you can do with a giant deep freeze isn’t there ?