One of my missions in life is to stop the Sainted One being his age. The saying one has heard so often applied to teenagers is “be your age”. That of course is bad advice, nobody wants to be their age, whatever it is when you think about it, and as one of the great sages said “youth is waste d on the young”. Anyway the Sainted One got going on one of his daring do stories at lunch here with more of my relatives, and of course they had not heard this one before whereas , me, well I have heard it many times, but it has changed dramatically over the last thirty years. It is to do with piloting an aircraft, at one stage it had a bit more going for it, because there was mention of flying a spare kidney in a small plane over the Alps in a snow storm. The kidney bit, seems to have got lost in the realms of time, because some rather unkind person asked if there was bacon with it? But yesterday they all listened in rapt attention, and as it has changed quite a lot and there is a new element introduced, I was actually listening to see what the latest version would be , I was not paying attention to the table and found myself putting salt and pepper on my cousins plate for him, and was about to start cutting up his meat. Everybody was very polite about it and laughed, but I am not sure it is a good sign. I then began to relate how the S O and Moi first met and his suave chat up line, and one of the more outspoken relatives commented that the Sainted One was a “silver tongued fox”.
Foxes are cunning and sly, and I like them actually, because they are good house keepers and they cut off chickens heads, and plan to come back for them later because in they are stocking up their larders. I often think about this when I am filling up my freeze with frozen chicken portions. For this reason I refrain from lecturing Sandy the patriarch fox at the end of our garden logically he would say that there is no difference. Actually Sandy is a taciturn sort of fellow, but he get what he wants. I don’t expect he is very chatty at home with the vixens. But I have seen him putting on one hell of a great show when the moon is full. This does in fact put me in mind of the S O who is silent a lot and complained again that he did not appreciate the snarky way I lug the washing down the five flights of stairs on a Monday, and suggested a bright helpful manner would be more fitting, as you can imagine this went down like a lead balloon. Now you understand why I talk to myself and to all the people who come here to eat, and my very agreeable dogs.
Now I often wonder if this taciturn thing is actually a turn off, or a turn on. It is probably better than some inane domestic chatter. So yes lets go for “Taciturnon” . More on the subject of long time married people, it’s time to put yourself in a care home if you start talking about “WE” all the time like some conjoined twin. I could not possibly do that . I take exception to someone knowing what I am doing all day and as for somebody answering for me with the “we think” thing , no chance. The S O never knows what I am thinking which is just as well.
There are A levels going on here, and the boy is working his, you know what, off. He should be a great success in life, and if he does well later on and becomes rich, he had promised me lunch at the Ritz. The pastoral care begins in the fridge and the creation of comfort food. Tricky because I am on a diet. But I have learned to eat little bits and slowly. Not my thing actually, because restraint is not really a virtue in my opinion, but quality makes for restraint, it is not quantity that counts. I have just eaten a dressed crab in the garden shed. Sandy knows but he also knows when to keep stum.